***

I couldn’t be sure.  Technically.

Technology, never my strong suit.  The worst, he would die, and I would not.

I would still be deeply bereaved.  And more guilty.  If still alive.

Disgraced in my culture.  Prosecuted.

And, I am so in love with him.

I turn back to the book, to be able to read mindlessly all night.

I do read.

All night.